KP says

"Dune: Part Two", Streaming, [2024] [Movie Review]

I already knew I would hate the "Dune" movies. Denis Villeneuve is the current number one on my movie director hate list. His movies are turds wrapped in pretty images. There is no humor. No memorable dialogue. No cool one-liners. No real character development. It's all about making it look good and impressive and to hell with anything else. How does "Dune" fit in here?

  • No humor? Check
  • No memorable dialogue? Check
  • No cool one-liners? Check
  • No real character development? Check

Add to that: 

  • both "Dune" movies are ridiculously long, 
  • several scenes make no sense to non-"Dune" fanatics, 
  • no satisfying backstory, 
  • the pacing is that of an asthmatic snail, 
  • you don't give a fuck about any of the characters, because you never get to know them, and it's not by the lack of great actors in the cast, it's just that they never get any chance to shine.

Part 2 is slightly less boring than Part 1, but then again it's 11 minutes longer, so I guess that makes them almost equally boring. The only thing the movies have going for them is that they look good. Had they even had a bit of the good old ultra violence it would have helped but they are fucking PG-13. No blood, no gore, no real violence. No good. Denis Villeneuve should be forced to watch all Paul Verhoeven's movies from beginning to end. That should teach him a thing or two about what makes a movie great and how to give it plenty of replay value.

I have actually read the first "Dune" novel many moons ago. I remember it as rather boring and I never managed to finish much of the second novel. Frank Herbert's way of writing really bored me a lot. In that way you can say that these new "Dune" movies are successful. They are just as boring as the original books. 

The David Lynch "Dune" movie from 1984 stank as well. At least it's so bad that you can laugh at it, and you can be done with the self-torturing in less than half the time compared to the new movies. The new movies will combined steal more than 5 hours of your time. Thank the Gods, I went for streaming and never saw any of these movies in the cinema.

Denis Villeneuve is insanely overrated as a movie director and anything he touches makes time stop. His movies literally try to bore you to death. "Dune". Been there, "Dune" that. Never again. I'm with Anakin Skywalker, I hate fucking sand.

Rating: 1

Movie Title: Dune: Part Two

Director: Denis Villeneuve

This Release: 2024

Movie Genre: Sci-Fi

RunTime: 166

Actors: Timothée Chalamet, Zendaya, Rebecca Ferguson, Javier Bardem, Josh Brolin, Austin Butler, Florence Pugh, Dave Bautista, Christopher Walken, Stellan Skarsgård

Movie Format: Streaming

Movie Label: Max

Content Type: Movie Review

Language: EN

Updated: 2024-05-26 15:02

Created: 2024-05-26 14:36

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